I was in a Sales class once when the teacher asked us to whip out a “mission statement”, just off the cuff.

With little time to think I wrote,

“To compassionately and patiently listen with an open heart and assist with my strength people who are in need of direction, who want to learn how to focus their energies and who are committed to realizing their dreams.”

I heard a collective “ahhhh” in the class after I volunteered to read it. Not the kind of ah that comes out when you see a baby playing with a kitten, but a sigh of wonder.

So it got me thinking again about what I want to stand for.

Just before class that morning I watched a student toss their cigarette on the ground. A common sight unfortunately, but what made it worse was the fact there was an ashtray right beside her. I looked down and saw dozens of butts littering the ground. More than dozens. I was rife with disgust. Not because of the smoking. Because of the total lack of respect. For our earth, for the well kept grounds on which the building stands, and for the wizened old man whose job it is to keep those grounds clean.

I was only a visitor for the 8 week project I attended, but I made a point of walking up to him a few days later and telling him that I always use the ashtray. His smile of gratitude could have lit up the sky. I felt deeply for this fellow who could barely speak English, who’s as small as a twelve year old and whose lot in life is to clean up after the thoughtless disregard of a bunch of smarmy, overfed Gen-Y’ers flaunting their undeserved, unearned sense of entitlement.

What are they going to stand for?

I was told by one of my classmates, “Linda you can’t save everyone.”

See, they got it wrong. It’s not that I want to save people as much as I want to beat some sense into them. Less Mother Teresa; more avenging archangel with flaming sword.

I WANT to stand for something.

I WANT to stand for hope and trust. Faith is their mother and I want to teach people not to be afraid to BELIEVE.

I WANT to stand for excellence. Who wants to get home after a long day and sigh with satisfaction, “Yep. I was mediocre again today. Well done.” I want to challenge people to see their own light.

I WANT to stand for and beside the people who own my heart. Nobody messes with me or mine and gets to call me friend if they do. Unacceptable.

What’s your mission statement? I’ll give you ten minutes to come up with something that defines your existence. If you include any of the following words, then you’re already on the road to standing for a life that will resonate long after it’s over:

Love. Hope. Faith. Trust. Compassion. Kindness. Forbearance. Brave. Patience. Laughter. Solution. Challenge. Believe. Soul. Husband. Wife. Lover. Mother. Father. Son. Daughter. Friend. Joy. Happiness. Good. Humour. Brilliant. Well Being. Balance. Achievement. Dream. Care. Passion. Abundance. Gift. Bliss. Direction. Aspirations. Courage. Strength. Ambition. Inspiration. Success. Idea. Wonder. Awe. Privilege. Charity. Noble. Spirit. Comfort. Vision. Focus. Power. Excitement. Adventure. Gratitude. Virtue. Enlightenment. Possibility. Commitment. Honour. Loyalty. Miracle. Cherish.

Peace,

Linda

“When a woman has owned her passionate nature, allowing love to flood her heart, her thoughts grow wild and fierce and beautiful. Her juices flow. Her heart expands. She has thrown off crutch and compromise. She has glimpsed the enchanted kingdom, the vast and magical realms of the Goddess within her. Here all things are transformed………when a woman rises up in glory, her energy is magnetic and her sense of possibility contagious. We have all seen glorious women, full of integrity and joy, aware of it, proud of it, overflowing with love. They shine.”

Powerful images woven by a modern-day philosopher/goddess, Marianne Williamson.

I laughed when I read her words.

Just the other day I wrote to a beloved exhorting him to be patient and compassionate while I healed from an unexpected state of sickness and weakness to my natural state……of shining.

Who talks like that? How many women recognize their own glow? I didn’t, until my late 30’s. When the face looking back at me from the mirror started to look less and less like a disappointed housewife and more like a mysterious, sensual, powerful being….I realized transformation doesn’t begin in the womb and end at puberty. I believe, if a woman is open to it, uncovering her own glory can happen now. Today. Why are you waiting? What are you waiting for? Permission? Are you going to sit down beside your partner and ask, “Honey? I’m going to start shining today. Is that ok?”

Marianne continues, “Women are not powerless. we just pretend we are. We do this in large part because we are afraid of the punishment inflicted on us when we dare to be who we really are…….In the wild we scream. We scream when we hurt, we scream when we give birth, we scream when we come, and that’s just the way it is. Now what kind of man can handle our passion…..? A princess attracts a prince and a queen attracts a king. Women who whine attract men who whine. Women full of the lioness heart attract men who are full of the lion.”

I read this perfect little book of Williamson’s and laughed ’til the tears came down my cheeks. I was tickled to read the words that I live by, written by another shining woman. I cannot compete with her wisdom; only do I want to share the idea that “A Woman’s Worth” is entirely in her own hands and well within her capacity to uphold.

I know women who shrink, who hold back, who settle and who cannot tell you the last time she knew joy. I feel for you. I really do. But I also want to kick your ass. Go to the mirror and look at the Goddess looking back at you. She wants you to shine.

In May of 2008 I graduated from an incredible business opportunity created by the Canadian government. It was two months of concentrated classes designed to whip wannabes into entrepreneurs. Met some great folks and as in all intense situations where humans are thrown together in a common cause, you develop warm and fuzzy feelings for people that in the “real” world you wouldn’t normally have extended the hand of friendship to just because of personality clashes and differences of values, etc.

Boy we were stoked…to the point that after the course ended several of us banded together and vowed to keep our enthusiasm alive by conducting our own monthly meetings. Sort of like rah rah sessions. Support and camaraderie as a new entrepreneur can not be over-rated. I invited everyone from the group to take advantage of my radio/TV show and to come and promote their business.

So the first couple of months went by and the meetings became more structured; less of a gab session and more meeting-like. We had a chair, a time keeper, a minute taker and huh….after we incorporated structure into the meetings a funny thing happened. People began to make excuses for not being able to attend. And eventually the meetings died a sorry death from pure apathy.

Apart from a couple of women who I bonded with, as a group we don’t communicate anymore.

Until last night. I received a forwarded email (also addressed to 20 more people) from one of the women in the course. There was no Hi, how are you. Just her signature; and when you scrolled, scrolled and scrolled the real message appeared. It was from  Sony Ericcson who wanted to distribute free laptops for their brand promotion. They promised that if you forwarded the email to 20 people you would receive their R320 laptop. Wow! Cool! Sweet! Sure.

Here’s my problem. It’s not the brand promotion by Sony Ericcson. As an entrepreneur I understand the need to get your name and product out there (by the way, catch my blogs and articles at lindakaban.com No. What I objected to was the fact that a women who hasn’t talked to me in over 9 months decided that she would use my name to get herself a free laptop.

I don’t know about you, but during the last ten years that I was employed the development of a best practices method through adherence to which we conducted our business became rote. I didn’t always like it. Being a maverick who worked best by being trusted and given a free rein, the Best Practices “bible” irked me somewhat.

However, as a lone businesswoman I see the merit in developing a personal code of conduct that includes such “soft” practices as: respect, thoughtfulness, mindfulness, kindness, compassion, open-mindedness, observance, and did I mention respect?

Look, if you’re going to develop relationships along the path of becoming an entrepreneur, tend to them.  If you believe a person or an organization has value to you then spend the time nurturing your associations. You cannot in all consciousness blow them off out of apathy and then expect to use their influence only when it suits you. Business relationships take time and care as much as personal ones.

In his “Top 200 Secrets of Success and the Pillars of Self-Mastery” leadership coach, author and wildly successful Canadian entrepreneur Robin Sharma has these few things to say:

#18 “By developing relationships with those committed to constant improvement and the pursuit of the best that life has to offer, you will have plenty of company on your path to the top of whatever mountain you seek to climb.”

#56 “Regularly send handwritten notes to your business clients and your other relations to strengthen the bond. Develop a system which reminds you to send something valuable to this network at least once every four months….Another idea is to send a recent article of interest to your contacts that you thought would interest them and that you continue to value their friendship. Relationship building should always be a central focus whether you are a CEO, a student, a salesperson or a parent.”

#129 “Become a committed and sincere networker. Cultivate new friendships. You will truly be surprised where people end up over the years and how small, kind gestures will help you later on in life. Treat everyone who crosses your path as if they are the most important person in your world. You will certainly meet with great success.”

I’ve met Robin a couple of times and I can say this for sure; he LIVES what he writes. There’s no faking the sincerity and enthusiasm of this man. We may not all become a giant in our fields as he has, but I believe that daily adherence to our own best practices will ensure that we create a path along which people will be pleased and maybe even honoured by their association with us. It should get to the point where your BEST practices become your only practices.

Peace,

Linda

“Far away there in the sunshine are my aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them and try to follow where they lead.” That quote by Louisa May Alcott was an integral part of the first website I had created three years ago.

I had been laid off in November of 2005 after 16 years at a major Canadian utility and the modest severance was my ticket to pursuing some dreams I had been nurturing for many years. Already a yoga teacher, I wanted to take that experience to another level and achieve a certification as a Life Coach. So with my quickly dwindling payout I contracted a young fellow to craft me a website. Oh god, it was beautiful to look at. All pink and aqua, it was my very first venue as a blogger and writer.

What I remember most about that first year is the reaction to my blogs. Never a quiet woman, in fact quite bold with a laugh that I’ve been assured can rupture eardrums, I had never really spoken what was in my heart. Nobody really knew what made me, me.  So it came as a “mostly” pleasant shock to my family and friends that I was capable of weaving words into thinly disguised morality tales. Sometimes hilarious, sometimes poignant, my blogs were written to engage, provoke and teach.

Just this year, I retired my beloved website in favour of a DIY site where I can do more “stuff.”  It’s still www.lindakaban.com but much more of a workhorse than my pretty “showcase” ever was. And my blogs/articles  became such a blast since I started adding video/podcasting.

The certification as a Life Skills Coach and Facilitator came in 2007 and the formal establishment of myself as the sole proprietor of a coaching business followed a year after that. My readership was growing by leaps and bounds and clients were beginning to sign up.

In June of 2008, I was asked for an interview on Liquid Lunch on thatchannel.com. Shortly afterwards I began thinking I can do this, and after a meeting with the founder of the station, signed up to produce and host my own internet TV show called Dare to Dream. Besides putting my marketing dollars to work, the show was a a venue for entrepreneurs and dreamers alike. Networking galore!

Because of that show, because of my constant attention to moving myself up the google food chain, I was contacted by CBC television on New Year’s Eve to be part of a short piece on resolutions because they wanted a Life Coach’s take.

I’ve been interviewed, published, quoted, approached to write a small book on success techniques and NONE of this would have happened if I hadn’t had a dream. And more importantly, if I hadn’t taken the steps to make those dreams a reality.

Every single one of you reading this has a dream. You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t.  There’s something in you, a small tug at your heart or a big burning need to BE who you were meant to be.

You know, in that short biographical intro to me, it all rhymed off chronologically, nice and neat. Let me assure you the journey was anything but. For as many times as I touched the sunshine where my dreams live, there were all too many times I was practically buried beneath fear and despair.

Here, in this blog, my wish is to not only to inspire you to take the steps to achieve your highest aspirations, to give you some tools you’ll need to navigate your path, but to assure you, on those days when it all seems too much, that everything you do, every action you take will bring you that much closer to your dream.

Peace,

Linda